Sitting in church last night, listening to the music, I could not slow my contemplations. I told God, "I can't believe this has happened to me -- LIFE. I can't believe this life has happened to me."
What will happen to my family? I predict so much turmoil and further struggles, all attaching themselves without my consent to this LIFE. Will I have a future family? The thought of being accountable for -- and striving to give my limited guidance to -- my future children is overwhelming. Will I ever be who God wants me to be? That thought alone can make me shudder. I was not created for myself, but for a greater Someone who I am to live for. When I fail Him, it hurts everywhere. It hurts everywhere.
When I think of the talents and blessings He has given me, I cannot help but have such joy for the amazing things that may happen in my LIFE. I will never take for granted my ability to hear music or the ability to see the sights around me. I am thankful for the mindset He has given me, though no one in my family seems to be able to relate to it or understand it. I am forever thankful for the sense of wonder He has given me, that I may look at small details in this LIFE and see the tiny traces of beauty He placed in them, while others walk by blindly.
It's the tip of the iceberg, and everyday is just another step onward throughout this journey He has ordained for me to carry on...another step forward into this incredible LIFE.
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